Instead, I say,“ Stick out your pinky.”Locking pinky fingers with you, I say, “I promise, I will never betray that trust.” And I mean it with all my heart. A pinky swear may seem childish, but in this context, it has real strength. It is solemn, and I truly feel it. I lay my cheek against your arm, and kiss above your bounds. At this instant, I love you so much, I feel as if my heart may burst.I ask myself, Could this man be he? Could this be the man who would care for me, and who would control me when I wanted it? Could he be able to take me when I needed that, and hold me, and comfort me? Would he understand that I need autonomy, but still need to worship? Would he allow me to be an adult in public, yet his slave in private? Would he let me wear his collar? Woud he keep me in just panties and a bra, so he could grasp my nipples anytine? But I stay these thoughts, knowing it is too soon.Lord Girl, why are you thinking these things,? I ask myself. You know it is much too soon. Just. We had devised a harness from several seatbelts and using a length of attached heavy wire the girls would drag the burden to the beach. I overhead "yassur boss" comments addressed in my direction as a result of this labor. I had also noticed Jennifer took a delight in using a switch on Brittany's behind if she felt the other girl was lagging.The girls had deepened their own special relationship apart from me. Both girls considered themselves "straight" and the developing sexual need was supposed to be a secret. I had not felt excluded and thought it provided them a deeper security. Brittany suffered deep bouts of homesickness and would slip into a lethargic melancholy. I observed Jennifer get sexually aggressive with Brittany when she was in this mood.The complex and constant barrage of stimuli of modern American life was lacking here. This simple primitive existence refocused your needs. The appreciation of our few pleasures had grown. We savored the company of each other. Talking,.
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